"And the day came when the risk it took to remain tightly closed in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to BLOOM…This is the Element of Freedom"

-Alicia Keys

23 November 2009

Am I ever going to learn?

**Sorry for the long post. I guess I have some things to talk about!**

I am infamous for my ability to be late. I am late for just about everything, work, school, parties, you name it. I was actually named "Most Likely To Be Late For Their Own Wedding" in high school. How sad! (On my wedding day, we were all running a bit behind schedule and everything turned out fine, so this prediction wasn't quite true). I used to walk (and sometimes run) to the bus stop with my best friend, Andrea (who is my polar opposite & always punctual) in order to make it on time. One time we missed it and had to get a ride to school. I also used to get a ride to school from a guy that I went to High School with and I always made us late. The lady in the front office always liked me and she would excuse my tardy with a lovingly stern, "now, this is the last time. Be here on time tomorrow!" But the next day, I would repeat the rhythm of the day before and rush around, feeding the dog, grabbing my school stuff and then we would be late. 10+ years later, we laugh about it but it is still a source of intense stress for me.

Being chronically late is something that has jeopardized my employment, friendships, my health and well-being. It has clouded the way that I see my self and the way that others see me. I think that the single most misunderstood trait of The Chronically Late Person is that they don't care that they are late. If people knew how upset it makes me to be late and the stress that it has caused me in my life, they would begin to understand that it isn't a matter of not caring, but a mixture (for lack of a better term) of several different components. Some of these are just habits so ingrained in the person that they seem to have no definitive beginning, they have always just been there. My Dad is always late, and so are 2 of his sisters (his brother and another sister are exceedingly punctual). Their Dad was in the Air Force and was never, ever late for anything. It almost seems like it is a disease or hereditary, while also a learned habit. I am afraid that Reese is going to learn or be late and more than anything, I want to teach her not to be late. I have literally told her, "This isn't what you are supposed to do. It isn't good to be late. Be like Daddy, he is never late!" My sweet husband...I was late for our first date and he still married me...

I read a book called Never Be Late Again: 7 Cures for the Punctually Challenged by Diana DeLonzor. She has several categories that most Punctually Challenged people fall in to, which cause them to be late. I am definitely the one who wants to do it all before I leave the house. I want to sleep in, I want to take a longer shower, I want to put in a load of laundry and drink my coffee and eat my breakfast and get ready and....you get the idea. Now, throw in getting a kid ready for school...kind of makes me want to kick my own ass. This is why I have started to take my blogging more seriously. It is a good way to sort some things out. This is an area in my life that needs to change and it is closely linked to many other areas. I have learned (the hard way) that being punctual takes planning (again, not where my strengths lie, but I am trying!) and working backwards (I have to leave at this time, so I need to start getting ready at this time, etc) and also having the discipline to get things ready the night before, to stop what I am doing and start getting ready to leave and leaving 10 minutes before I actually have to leave in order to allow for extra time for traffic or whatever.

I also need to wear a wear a watch. I own several and wear none. Surprised? Probably not. I need to get a battery for one that has been in my glove compartment for a very long time. This is a watch that I was wearing on 09/11/01 and it stopped at 12:05 am. The time that it actually stopped was 11:55 pm (9/10), but I had it set 10 minutes fast...so I wouldn't be late. I haven't worn the watch since. But I know that it is time to wear one. I am going to buy a watch battery today on my lunch break. Seriously I will!

{I need one of these

{So I can wear one of these}
{this isn't my watch, but it's cute! But I will not buy a new watch in the hope that it will magically help me be on time. I will wear the one that I have and I know that becoming a punctual person is a journey that I am embarking on}

Andrea, I am sorry for all of the times that you had to wait for me to finish getting ready and for making you run with my mis-matched, birkenstock-wearing hippy ass to the bus stop. Thanks for being such a good friend then & now. Love you.

1 comment:

  1. Interesting. I have always been very early. Like the weird girl who shows up half an hour before a dinner party while the hostess is still blow drying her hair or something. AWKWARD.

    Anyway, I have been late a few times since having Cordelia and I find it very upsetting. So, like you I am now planning in advance; setting out breakfast dishes the night before, setting out clothes, showering, etc. It seems to be working. Good luck to you!


Related Posts with Thumbnails