"And the day came when the risk it took to remain tightly closed in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to BLOOM…This is the Element of Freedom"

-Alicia Keys

07 December 2012

Rut Buster

I am in a rut.  Not a bad life rut, just a "I-need-physical-exercise-in-the-worst-possible-way-and-not-just-to-lose-the-last-of-this-baby-weight rut" (and I will be honest here, it is a little bit of baby weight, but mostly leftover weight from sitting on my ass in a cubicle at a job that I hated strongly disliked for 3 1/2 years of my life).  In other words, I need yoga.  Bad.  I love yoga because it seriously does things for your body and mind that no other exercise can even begin to do.  It is pricey though.  Not good when you are financially challenged at the moment.  Enter google.  I found a free class every Sunday morning that combines yoga, running, breathing and laughter.  Four things that I need and love!!

I think that I am in a rut because I need to make myself a priority more often. Maybe not myself, but my health and well-being a priority.  When I was younger, before I had my first child and before I was married, I would read about mothers in women's magazines.  You know the type.  They were the ones who never took time for themselves and one day found themselves out of shape, no longer stylish, hadn't worn make up since they had their first kid and their hair comes in one style: The Ponytail.

I am not that woman.  I wear make up every day and although I certainly don't go shopping for clothing very often (okay never), and I have no idea who the pop music artists are (a clear indicator that I am now a grown-up),  I have style and I want to take good care of myself.  And I never wear my long hair in a ponytail.

I think that it is hard to make your physical and mental well-being a priority sometimes and it is especially difficult when you have a family to take care of.  There is that whole not-being-able-to-just-walk-out-the-door-to-go-to-the-gym-when-you-feel-like-going thing that mothers have going on that can be a hindrance sometimes ;)  Even when Josh is here with the kids and I go out for a run (which admittedly hasn't happened in a long time and that makes me sad because I love running ), I usually stay close to our house and run around our neighborhood, which is not exactly peaceful.  I admit that I am nervous about running on the trails near the river by our house alone, so I don't.  We have a dog that is a total sweetheart but damn, he sucks to run with because when he sees another dog, he acts like a lunatic.  I remember a few months ago, I really, really needed to go running and when I mentioned going, all of a sudden the entire family was going with me to walk while I ran nearby.  I almost burst into tears because I really just needed time alone dammit!!  Then I felt bad for feeling that way.  What the hell?  Why do we feel bad needing time alone, when we spend so much time caring for others?  Even when you know you shouldn't feel guilty or bad, you do any way.  Pretty sure you know what I am talking about here.

So...I was playing pretend with Reese tonight.  She loves to set up shops or studios in our little mud room/laundry room and play pretend.  She has had a fix-it shop, a store, a vet clinic among many others, but my personal favorite was her "Kroty" studio last fall.  Her best friend is in Karate, so Reese wanted to pretend and Elliot's Kroty Studio was in our mud room for a few weeks.  We still laugh about that one....anyway, tonight it was Beth's Ballet School.  She thought this was funny because my name is Elizabeth, but I grew up as Beth for most of my life...I was in my early 20's when I decided to use my full name.  You wouldn't believe the people who gave me shit for it.  Um. Excuse me??  It is MY NAME, thankyouverymuch.  If I want to use my full name, which I love, instead of my nickname, which I never liked (sorry mom!), I am going to do it regardless of who doesn't like it.  (We had fun, even though pretend play has tested my patience level more than a few times over the last 8 years.  I now know that I am not the only mom who feels this way, thanks to my excellent neighbor who is a fantastic mother, who let me know that she strongly dislikes pretend play too sometimes).  I was the instructor, who was "instructed" to lead the stretching for the ballet students (Reese and our dog, Elliot).  I did a few downward dogs, cat/cows and warrior poses and that is when I realized that all I really need is some yoga in my life again.  I don't mean my prenatal yoga video or my postnatal boot camp video.  I need real, live yoga.  In a studio, with real people around me.

So, this Sunday morning, I am going to drag out my mat, shake the dust off it and get into my car with my best girl friend.  To celebrate 32 years of friendship, yoga, running, breathing and laughing.  Now I will have 5 things that I need and love in my life.  Five things that absolutely guarantee a way out of a rut!

{Jamie Elmer}

 This is what Jamie Elmer, an instructor at First Ray Yoga in Minturn, Colorado, says yoga does for her. "Yoga helps me connect to myself so that I can connect to those around me.”

Sounds about right :)


06 December 2012

I mustache you a question

I have a confession to make.  I have a thing for mustaches.  I don't know why or where it originated from, but I have always liked mustaches on men.

Let me state for the record that I do not like creepy, unkept, bushy, thin, gross, nasty mustaches.

I think that I really just like this one mustache.

{The Mustache of Tom Selleck}   
Maybe it is because I watched Magnum P.I. as a kid.

Thank you, Tom Selleck.  You have the best mustache ever.

30 November 2012

Thanksgiving 2012 & Kindness

This is the post I was having a hard time editing the other night & I still am having issues with it. I wanted to post this the night of Thanksgiving, but wasn't able to. So, here it is!

This was the first Thanksgiving that:
A). I have not spent with at least a few members of my extended family.
B).  I made everything from the turkey to the pie.

This year, my parents were out of town, visiting my 88 & 90 year old Nanny & Poppy at their warmer climate home, Josh's parents and now his sister and her family all live out of state.  My various cousins and aunts and uncles were also out of town.  That left the four of us to have Thanksgiving here, in our cozy little house.  I have made dishes to take to different places as a guest, but I have never made everything, including a turkey, but I am not one to turn down a culinary challenge, so I was excited.

I was a little nervous about how we were going to pay for everything, as we have been through a bit of a financial pickle (for lack of a better word!), especially since I have stayed home with Carter, leaving us with only 1 income.  We have become quite creative with ways to make our money stretch through the month, although some months I really don't know how we are going to make it, we always find a way.  Thank you Lord. Seriously.  I started to continue to write more, but really this is its own post.  I will have to continue on a different day.

So, the night before Thanksgiving, we went to Whole Foods to buy our vegetables, some baking supplies and to look at their turkeys.  I didn't want to make an entire turkey, it was just going to be the four of us & I didn't want to have to fuss over it.  I was just going to look at what they had & see what we could afford.  When we got there, Josh went to look at turkey, while I shopped for vegetables.  A few minutes later, Josh came over with a big bundle  wrapped in brown paper.  I looked at the price and admittedly, I suffered from shock for a second. It probably wasn't a lot for most people, but it was a lot for us right now. We were going to have to trim our list down so that we could pay for the rest of our stuff.  After a slightly uncomfortable discussion, we decided that we simply couldn't afford the turkey and that we would have to take it back to the meat department and then buy the rest of our stuff.  I was embarrassed as I walked back to the department to talk to the butcher, but I was sure that they would take it back.  I told the young guy what had happened, that we just couldn't afford the turkey, that I hoped it wasn't a problem and hoped that they could still sell it and thank you anyway.  The guy said, "no, it's not a problem at all..."

I turned and walked away.

A moment later, I heard him say, "Ma'am? Just a moment."

I turned around and saw him put a sticker on the brown paper bundle. He handed me the turkey back and told me that he had taken care of it and to have a nice Thanksgiving.

It was then that my eyes filled with tears and I said, "thank you. you have no idea how much this means to me and to my family..." It is impossible to describe how much it really meant to me at that moment.

I thought about that Whole Foods employee many times on Thanksgiving (and many times since) and we prayed for him when we said grace that night.

I think that it is so easy to think that the world is going to hell in a handbasket sometimes. I think that is because goodness and kindness and gentleness are quiet things, that don't beg to be noticed or reported. Violence and hatred and arrogance are loud, beastly things that demand attention and we live in a world that gives it to them. I feel very blessed and grateful for the act of kindness that was given to my family. I look forward to paying it forward. I will be able to help a family the way that mine was helped this Thanksgiving and I seriously can't wait!


29 November 2012

This is the best thing to wake up and see

The BubbyChubb. Still sleeping peacefully this morning. I felt bad that we had to wake him up to take Reese to school. He smiled before his eyes were even fully open. Such a happy boy!

26 November 2012

A Gentle Reminder....

I was struggling to come up with something to write about tonight, but then I came across this quote:

"Those who love you are not fooled by mistakes you have made or dark images you hold about yourself. They remember your beauty when you feel ugly; your wholeness when you are broken; your innocence when you feel guilty; and your purpose when you are confused."

— Alan Cohen

I think the reason I love this quote so much is because this is what having my own family to raise and love and care for has taught me.  I have an amazing husband who has lifted me out of some dark places and reminded me of who I really am, even when I seem to have forgotten it myself.  I hope that this is something that I can teach my children, that this is what a family is, what a family does for the people who are in it.

{I found this quote on a blog called deep down.  She used to have another blog (that I followed when I used to blog a bit more frequently, before Carter was born), but she now has a new (Darling!!) baby girl and a new blog. So good!}

25 November 2012

I heart Colorado

This is a picture of the unbelievable sunset we had last night. Soooo incredible!!!!

23 November 2012

I just wrote an entire post and it went into some crazy mode that won't let me make any changes after I previewed it.  I have had this happen before, but this time, I am over it.  I will have to figure it out in the morning.........................................................................................................................................

20 November 2012

Done!

I just completed an order for a friend from college who saw some of the things that I have made on Facebook and put in an order with me.

2 Dresses for her 6 & 4 year old daughters, a bib set (1 small, 1 medium & 1 large bib), a burp cloth and a stuffed frog that I designed one night a couple of years ago and it has become one of things that people ask me to make the most.

A couple of late nights, but I am done!!

I really should post some pictures on here, but they are still on my camera and I think that I can seriously hear my bed calling my name.  I need to answer that call because tomorrow night, I will be cooking up a storm as I get ready to prepare my first ever Thanksgiving Dinner!  It will just be the 4 of us, my family is out of town this time around and Josh's family lives out of state.  Thank goodness for Skype!!


19 November 2012

Happy

I have been sewing like a mad woman the last few days....really, like a mad woman.  This has resulted in my 8 year old watching more tv today than I would like to admit...

it is okay though because I love it.  I think that is a good thing for your children to see- their momma, working hard at something that she loves to do.  I always tell my family that one day, we will look back at the days when our kitchen was overtaken by my etsy business, and remember those days fondly.  I know that I will.  Someday I will have a studio, filled with beautiful fabrics being made into wonderful things, but by then my kids will be bigger and I will be older (and wiser of course!!) So, right now, I am happy in my tiny kitchen/studio, sewing the night away, while my babies and husband (and dog and cat and fish) sleep peacefully.

Thank goodness for the cheap coffee we have in our cupboard.  And for the sexy husband who makes it for me in the morning :)


18 November 2012

Happy Birthday

Happy Birthday to three of my favorite people in the world....


My Grandfather, Poppy, turned 90 on the 17th of November.  His wife, Nanny, turned 88 on the 10th of November and their daughter, my Mom, is celebrating her birthday today.


I love you!!

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